Quiet Time for a Broken Heart

And I'm very excited to be bringing you another dose of hope.

I told you I was gonna give you all these doses of hope leading up to the book launch, and guess what?

We are five days, my friend, five days away from the launch of my new book,

Hope is the First Dose, from Penguin Random House, Waterbrook,

and I am very grateful to be bringing you another book.

If you haven't pre-ordered the book, there are some goodies that you can get,

a playlist on Spotify that I'm dropping songs for you.

Every day lately, from that playlist, and I'm hearing from Instagram followers

that they're really finding it valuable is Quiet Time Bible Study.

It's a journey, starts with some songs that are hard, that are, when you're hurting,

that the feelings that you have when you're losing someone, there's some songs

that Mitch loved, there's some songs that we used to listen to together,

and some songs that I listened to when I was healing from losing him,

and when I was writing this book.

And then the songs get progressively more hopeful, and we land on Tommy Walker's

song, I Have Hope. And so I think the playlist will be helpful to you.

There's other goodies that you can get if you pre-order and upload your proof

of purchase, including screensavers for your computer, lock screen for your

phone, three sample chapters that you can share with other people to help them

find out about the book if you want.

And there's a new resource that just came up today from Bible App,

the YouVersion website, bible.com.

Has a five-day reading plan based on my book, Hope is the First Dose.

We did one for, I've seen the interview and it's been downloaded and completed almost 50,000 times.

The new one just dropped yesterday. So if you wanna do a five-day Bible study

around the themes of this book, you can start that.

You can go to the YouVersion website, bible.com, or the Bible app on your phone

or iPad or mobile device.

And you can type in Lee Warren or type in Hope is the First Dose and you can

find it. I'll also put a link in the show notes to the Bible study.

It'd be really cool if we all started it on Tuesday. the day the book releases,

and a bunch of us did it together.

We have a five-day Bible study around the launch of the book,

so let me know if you wanna do that.

I'll send the link out on my Sunday newsletter this week. If you're not getting

that, check it out, wlewarrenmd.com slash newsletter.

Or drlewarren.substack.com if,

you wanna go straight there, and that's how you can find out about that.

Today, we're gonna do a quick, quiet time. I've got a few scriptures for you

around the self-brain surgery of what to do when you have a broken heart.

We got an email from a friend who's going through just a devastating thing with

her family. There's a...

And there's a spouse and there's a marriage that's breaking up and there's a

child in the middle and there's some legal action and there's some all kinds

of just trouble and it's painful and it's heartbroken, that they're heartbroken

and nobody knows what to do.

So we're gonna just come alongside them and pray for them.

There's some really good biomedical research, by the way, about what happens

when people pray and there's some outstanding,

solid research that's been published that when you pray for other people,

you get better and they get better. They're scientifically validated.

I'm gonna talk about this in a podcast one of these days. We're gonna look at that research.

And it's amazing what happens when people pray for each other.

There's science behind it. It really matters.

The quantum physics of the universe, God does stuff when people pray.

And so I'm just saying, when the situation seems impossible,

know that your prayers matter. They do matter.

And they can come alongside, they can encourage, they can lift up,

and sometimes can change the outcome of a situation.

So don't ever give up. just pray, wlemd.com slash prayer is the website.

You can literally have people all over the world praying for you if you upload a prayer request.

Or you can get on there and help pray for people all over the world.

It's important and it's powerful.

We had 114 countries in which people downloaded the podcast last week.

So when I say that there are people literally all over the world that will pray

for you, there are, even in the Isle of Man and Trinidad and Tobago and Russia

and China and Japan and Korea.

There are people everywhere all around the world that will pray for you,

and you can pray for them.

So wlemd.com slash prayer is the place to go if you're dealing with something,

or if you wanna jump on board and pray for these other people that are struggling.

That's how we do it. It's through self-brain surgery, it's through prayer,

it's through community, and that's the treatment plan.

And I can't wait to give you the treatment plan with my new book,

Hope is the First Dose, in five days. So pre-order it, check it out, pre-order it, okay?

Today we're gonna do a little self-brain surgery around the idea of what to

do when you have a broken heart, and we'll give you two more songs from the playlist.

The first one is Song of a Broken Heart by Casting Crowns and then the second

one is Keep On Hopin' by Riley Clemons, we're gonna get into all that and we're

gonna remember that when your heart is broken,

you can't change your life until you change your mind and the good news about

that, my friend, is that you can start today.

I'm drinking black silk out of a Yeti cup. I wish I was a paid endorser or sponsored

by Yeti or Folgers Black Silk, because I use a lot of it, but I'm not.

Hey, if you're listening and you work for Yeti or Folgers and you want to sponsor the Dr.

Lee Warren Podcast, hook me up just kidding black silk from folders is my favorite

coffee it's not fancy it's just strong and I love it it's too bitter for Lisa

and Tata they like other coffees black silk is my go-to so.

That's what I'm doing. Okay, I've got some scripture for you this morning, friend.

And I started off in kind of a lighthearted mood this morning for some reason.

But the song when I woke up this morning in my heart was this Casting Crown

song, Song of a Broken Heart.

And it's just a guy singing with a guitar and some harmony, it's really beautiful.

But it's basically saying that this is what you do when your heart breaks.

Here's what you gotta be thinking about. Here's some things to put in your mind

and in your heart when you're hurting.

And I wanna give you some of those this morning. I've got, let's see,

six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 10 or 11 scriptures here for you.

And we're just gonna talk about them, and then we're gonna pray through them, or sing these songs.

Hope is the first dose, my friend. You gotta take hope before you can start

healing, before you can engage with any kind of treatment plan.

There has to be hope first.

So here's the first verse, Isaiah 26, three.

Those with sound thoughts, you will keep in peace.

In peace because they trust you. The New King James Version says,

you will keep in perfect peace is those whose minds are set on you.

So check this out. You have to have sound thinking in order to find peace.

And one of the things that trauma and tragedy does is it messes with our thinking.

It tells you lies. It pops thoughts into your head. This is never gonna get

better. I can't get over this. I'm really done for this time.

And after you lose a child, I guarantee you you'll have some of the thoughts

like we did. What did I do wrong? How could I have prevented this?

I must not be a very good dad.

I'm never gonna get over this. All those thoughts happen automatically.

And the problem with automatic thoughts, as Daniel Lehman has so clearly demonstrated

with his brain imaging studies, is automatic thoughts about five to one are not true.

You have thinking that's disordered when you're hurting.

You have thinking that's not valid and the veracity of it is not accurate.

And you're just gonna make a mistake with your heart and with your life if you

don't understand that when you're hurting, you're likely to have feelings and

thoughts that aren't accurate. And that's why I teach the self-brain surgery

of the biopsy, the thought biopsy.

Learn how, even when you're hurting, so you make a prehab decision before the

massive thing that you are going to develop a habit and a discipline of not

reacting to every thought that you have before you think about it.

So Isaiah 26.3, this is self-brain surgery.

Those with sound thoughts, you will keep in peace. In peace because they trust.

In you. Remember, hope is a verb, it's memory.

It's your memory. Yeah, it feels like all is lost right now,

but God's gotten me through situations before when I felt that way.

God throughout history has rescued people and helped people in hard situations.

And we're in the middle of a long story where this is not just one moment and

everything is all pass or fail right now.

This is a long story that he's telling that ends with him redeeming me.

And I had to grab onto that and believe that Mitch was in a better place, he really was.

And it's not a good thing to say to somebody when they first lose a child,

hey, he's in a better place now.

Doesn't really help, but it comes to be true and it comes to help you.

And if you get your thinking right, you'll find peace.

So Isaiah 26 three is self-brain surgery. Those with sound thoughts you will

keep in peace because they trust in you. That's the bottom line.

That's the self-brain surgery. Learn how to think about your thinking when you're hurting.

Psalm 5110 in the NIV created me a pure heart.

Renew a steadfast spirit within me. What we need is resilience.

I love Kristen Smedley and Mary Fran Bontempo's podcast. I want to be on there.

We're recording this afternoon actually.

Their podcast is called Brilliantly Resilient and I've had both of them on the

show before and they talk about resilience as this character of being able to

take a punch and take a blow and keep on going with this grit and grace idea,

just keep on pushing through.

And don't give up, take the body blow and renew a steadfast spirit.

You're asking God to just keep me steadfast, keep me strong,

renew my heart. And in the Old Testament, heart and mind are really the same thing.

So renew my mind and give me that resilience.

Psalm 19, 14, may these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart be

pleasing in your sight, Lord, my rock and my redeemer.

Okay, so the idea is you want to tell God that even when you're hurting,

you want to be thinking the right thoughts, the meditation of your heart,

the things that you're pondering.

You want him to help you strengthen those up, shore them up so that that trust

in you that Isaiah talked about is how you get your way back to peace.

So you want to tell God, create in me this heart that can handle the blows,

the massive things that come along, and still be thinking the right thoughts

about you because that's where I'm going to find peace, right?

The goal is to find peace. Psalm 139.23.

Search me God and know my heart. Test me and know my anxious thoughts.

Search me know me test me know my anxious thoughts see the idea You're gonna

have anxious thoughts when massive things happen.

You're going to that's not wrong But the way back to peace the way back to hope

the way back to happiness is to learn how to say okay I'm suffering this blow.

It's making me think all these disordered thoughts I need to figure out which

ones are true and call my anxiety and find the way forward by finding that peace

again that resilience and purpose and peace.

Because I know once I biopsy the thinking and find what's right,

God will lead me back to the ground

I need to stand on in spite of the circumstances that I'm going through.

Proverbs 3.5, trust in the Lord with all your heart and don't lean on your own understanding.

Your neuroscience is going to trick you and deceive you and tell you all kinds

of lies after the trauma that you're going through.

Our friend that I mentioned a while ago is probably feeling right now that her

situation with her child and grandchild and in-law is never going to get better,

it's impossible, it's hopeless. Those are all lies.

There is a path forward here.

Regardless of the outcome of the legal situation, there's a path forward.

God has a plan for each of those people, friend.

And so search me, you tell him, know me, test me, help me understand my thinking

and help me figure out how to clear it up so I can grab onto what's true and

then deal with the truth and move forward.

Proverbs 1727 has been our theme verse for self-brain surgery the whole time.

Can you bridle your tongue when your heart is under pressure?

And I say, can you bridle your brain? Because your tongue acts on your brain,

on your brain's impulses. You say what you think.

So if you can learn how to bridle your thinking, get it under control,

even when your heart's under pressure, that's how you show that you're wise.

And understanding heart slash mind keeps you cool, calm, and collected no matter

what you're facing. That's Proverbs 1727 in the Passion Translation.

Philippians 4, 6 through 8 is the self-brain surgery of the New Testament,

is whatever you're thinking about needs to be better.

Think on these things. Think on things that are good and noble and trustworthy

and true and all that stuff.

And then the payoff is that the peace will come on you. You'll reduce your anxiety.

You're gonna find your way back to clarity and hope if you learn how to think about your thinking.

That's what Lamentations 3 is about. It's like losing hope and I choose to take

hope by remembering that the steadfast love of the Lord never ceases,

his mercies never come to an end.

That's what John 16, 33 and John 10, 10 are both about.

In this world, you're gonna have trouble. The thief comes to steal and kill

and destroy, but I've come that you might have abundant life.

Those are mind-changed verses that you can use when your heart's under pressure.

And then Colossians 3 15, let the peace that Christ gives control your thinking.

It's for peace that you were chosen to be together and always be thankful.

So listen, if you let his peace and his hope and his happiness and his plan

control your thinking, then nothing that happens can threaten your security,

your peace of mind, your path forward, your ability to put your life back together.

Because after the massive thing happens, you do still have a life that has to

be managed. You've got other people that care about you. You've got a purpose and a plan.

And as Viktor Frankl has said, your life ceases to feel like suffering when

you understand that there's purpose.

And no matter what you're going through, no matter what you're facing,

if you can find purpose and meaning again, you can find a path forward.

I keep saying that, but that's how you feel when you're hurting,

when you're struggling, when you're desperate, when the massive thing has occurred,

it feels like life is gonna stop right then.

But unless you died too, your life hasn't stopped.

And if you're a Christian, even if you do die from the thing that's happening,

from the tumor, the trauma, whatever, you still have a purpose and a life beyond that.

So learning how to keep the thinking clear is how you manage your life.

Let's do this song of a broken heart by casting crowns for a minute.

Just kind of meditate on these scriptures and these ideas for a few minutes

and we'll sing this song.

Music.

It's beautiful, beautiful song of a broken heart by Casting Crowns.

It's on the playlist you get if you pre-order the book.

And I just want to give you that for a few minutes so you could kind of spend

some time today. Go back to it, listen to it again and again,

and put these scriptures, Isaiah 26, 3.

Those with sound thoughts you will keep in peace, in peace because they trust in you.

Get your thinking right. Learn how to biopsy your thinking.

Learn how to do that self brain surgery to transplant the negative harmful false

thoughts that aren't true for better ones And if they are true if there are

some things that about your situation that that you're thinking is harm It's painful and negative,

but it is true Like sometimes some of the things that we think are true then

what we need to do is just learn how to not despair Over them but to take those

true things and find the way forward in dealing with them properly.

So we stop catastrophizing around them and just react to them properly.

Sometimes I do a biopsy and there is a cancer and I need to treat it.

I don't need to just throw out my hands and freak out and run away because it's bad news.

I need to get after treating it and that's what you need too,

my friend, and that's what the treatment plan is for, okay?

The final verse I want to give you today is Psalm 71 14 and it's our theme verse

for hope is the first dose.

If I sign a copy of that book for you, I'm going to sign Psalm 71 14.

As for me, I will always have hope.

As for me, I will always have hope. This is that doom, spiro,

sparrow, that while I breathe, I hope idea.

And this, if you look at 7114, from Psalm 7114 in the Old Testament,

and you look at the Hebrew, guess what word shows up? As for me, I will always have hope.

It's yakal, this I will always wait.

It's this waiting idea. Okay, some people have this ability to take a punch

and say, all right, I'm gonna just wait. I'm gonna wait for God to show up here.

I'm gonna fight through this.

I am not gonna give up. Okay, the diagnosis is bad.

I'm gonna wait, I'm gonna hope, I'm gonna pray. I'm gonna hang in there.

You can't take away my hope.

I lost my child. That's gonna devastate me, but I'm gonna hang on.

I know God's gonna show up. He's gonna keep that Psalm 34, 18 promise of coming

alongside me when I'm brokenhearted. I'm gonna wait. I'm gonna call.

As for me, I will always have hope. I am going to hang on to that rope.

Other places, the word is similar. Where is Kovah, this idea of holding on to

the tightly bound cord that's holding the tension between what's happening now

and what he's going to do next?

And it's true. And the more you do that, the more you engage and flex those

muscles of hope and hold on tight, he comes through.

He'll show up. He'll help you. And so we're gonna keep on hoping.

We're gonna sing that with Riley Clemens as we go out.

Keep on hoping is the song that she's singing. And it's exactly right,

because that's what Psalm 71 14 is. As for me, I will always shall call.

I will always hold on. I will never stop holding on. I will always have hope.

I will doom, sparrow, sparrow. So as long as I'm breathing, I will be hoping.

I will keep on hoping. I will change my life and I will change my mind. And I will start today.

Music.

Hey, thanks for listening. The Dr. Lee Warren podcast is brought to you by my

brand new book, Hope is the First Dose.

It's a treatment plan for recovering from trauma, tragedy, and other massive things.

It's available everywhere books are sold, and I narrated the audio books.

Hey, the theme music for the show is Get Up by my friend Tommy Walker,

available for free at TommyWalkerMinistries.org.

They are supplying worship resources for worshipers all over the world to worship

the most high God. and if you're interested in learning more,

check out TommyWalkerMinistries.org.

If you need prayer, go to the prayer wall at WLeeWarrenMD.com slash prayer,

WLeeWarrenMD.com slash prayer, and go to my website and sign up for the newsletter,

Self Brain Surgery, every Sunday since 2014, helping people in all 50 states

and 60 plus countries around the world.

I'm Dr. Lee Warren, and I'll talk to you soon. Remember, friend,

you can't change your life until you change your mind, And the good news is you can start today.

Music.